Day 80: I Know, Mama

One of the most amazing gifts we are given as new mothers is deep empathy for one another. When my best friend gave birth two months behind the emergence of my little one, I was amazed by the strengthening of our bond through this shared experience. When she shares the pain and terror of her birth experience, I know so viscerally what she experienced. When we video chat with her hair his way and that, baby whining in her lap, on the other end I bounce on my yoga ball and wipe spit up from my shoulder. There is a level of understanding there that is shared only by those who are going through it together.

Being a whole two months more seasoned in this field of newborn parenting, I can offer suggestions here and there, sort of. But more importantly, I let her know that I know. I know it is harder than one can possibly imagine. I let her tell me how hard it is, without judgement, and I nod in agreement.

So I invite you to use your gift of deep knowing to support other new mamas with their struggles. This is not necessarily the knowing of which nipple worked best for bottle-feeding your kiddo (though these practical tips are helpful, too). This is the ability to listen closely, to feel what they are feeling, because you just went through it, to give a hug and say, “I know, mama. I know” and mean it with all of your being.